Tuesday, June 29, 2010

Finding Forty, Day 34; Rainy Days

I'm agitated. I think I have been all morning and now it's sliding into the afternoon.

The thing is, I can be a really funny person, I love to laugh, but mostly I feel like Eeyore all the time, just bitching and moping about everything.

When I feel agitated, I get this feeling, like I need to shed my skin. I just can't stand things and want to pull my hair out.

But, then I feel guilty for complaining and that just piles onto the agitation.

Maybe I'm grumpy because at this very moment, it's pouring rain outside and I happen to have my own three kids, plus SEVEN more inside right now. Yes, I have TEN kids in my crackerbox of a house.

It's no wonder I'm in the midst of a mid life crisis. When the storm clears and the kids head home, I'll be out of about $100 worth of groceries and my house will look like a tornado hit it, despite my best efforts to get them to clean up.

Don't get me wrong. I wanted kids and LOVE mine. Shit, I even love the neighbors' kids, I'm just tired and mopey and want peace and quiet.

If I get inspired, I'll blog better later.

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